a heavy heart

 I wasn't expecting to have to write this post. Not this soon, anyway. My amazing friend, Michelle, went home to be with the Lord yesterday morning. She fought a short, but very difficult, battle with cancer with such courage & grace.

I met Michelle in middle school & she was the kind of person that could just light up a room. She had such a great personality & a contagious smile. She was the kind of person everyone wanted to be around. I don't think it has really sunk in yet that she is gone. It doesn't seem real. 28 seems too young to deal with losing a friend. I'm sure it will hit me when I am surrounded by my friends tomorrow at her visitation; or when I am wanting to send her a random snapchat picture. But right now? I just can't believe that she is gone.

I will hold close all of the fun memories we had together. I went through TONS of old pictures last night & just laughed over how ridiculous some of them were. We have some great memories & I know we will keep laughing when we see each other again! 

Michelle was SUCH a blessing in my life. Especially my freshman year of college. I spent a very hard 2nd semester at home & she was my only friend still in Marietta. We spent so many nights that semester together driving around East Cobb & taking frequent road trips to Athens. I will cherish those memories forever.

I just saw Michelle last Sunday when I was home for our friend, Alex's, baby shower. She looked great & was feeling pretty good. We had fun reminiscing & making bows for baby Ellie. I hugged her & told her I would be back in a month. I really wish I had known that was the last time I would get to hug Michelle. I selfishly want her back for just 10 more minutes so I could make sure she knew how much I loved her & how big of an impact she has had on my life.  I wish I could tell her how much it meant to me that she adored my boys & it made me smile when she asked me to send her pictures of them. I wish we could have one more girls night at El Jinete (is that even still there??) & end up piled in Carly's hot tub wearing Mrs. Rachman's old one piece bathing suits. I wish so badly that she was still here with us, but I am so thankful that Michelle is healed & no longer in any pain. I had 15 years of friendship with her & I know I will get to see her again one day. For that, I am thankful.